Coaches Corner~Spouses

Courting relationships, like spousal relationships can be quite tedious in nature. As an Extraordinary Coach, we must be careful not to allow our own thinking to get in the way of our progress. We can form certain groups of thoughts around a particular person, and characterize that person as troublesome. By doing that, we put ourselves at the mercy of whatever trouble they wanted to issue to us that day. Recently, I had a change of status, I had a change of mind about my own spouse, and that's why I now realize that much of the difficulties I have experienced, have been a result of my own thinking.

You may have clients that you think are bothersome, you may have clients that you would rather not interact with. I want to suggest to you that that is purely your thinking that is doing that to you, because when you get right down to it, no one is born to do your bidding. No one is born to do the things that you want them to do, and you were not born to do the things that anyone else wants you to do. We simply exist in this space, and having relationships with ourselves that are successful, will allow us to have successful relationships with others. We must not allow our own thinking to get in our way.

I had recently planned a trip, and had scheduled a flight to go to a certain place. I was happy with the trip I had scheduled, however, my spouse wanted to get involved in making a change. Now she realized that money is important, and she realized that economics play a big part in our lives. She was trying to save me some money by finding me another flight, same day, same destination, same everything but just a different flight at a substantial savings. I immediately found myself thinking that she was being controlling. I found myself going back to that place where I used to live where I was unhappy, where I felt trapped. The reason I felt that way was for no other reason than it was in my head, and I had a vested interest to feel that way. I wanted to feel like a victim.  The truth is my wife love me and is always trying to help.

At that moment I had an instant state change and I realized that much of the misery that I had experienced in my relationship was due to me and the way that I was thinking. The same can be true of you. When you consider that the life that you live, you experience through your thinking and through your heart, you will come to realize yourself, that much of what you have experienced has been your choice. You simply need to reconcile the fact that for some reason you want to feel powerful, or for some reason you want to feel weak.

As an Extraordinary Coach, if you are not present to these particular ideas in yourself, if you can't really get in touch with the fact that what I'm saying is true, then you won't believe that it is true of your clients, and you will be less of an Extraordinary Coach than you want.  There is lots of merit to what I am saying. If you want to embrace it, and understand it, you will be a much better coach, you will be a much more Extraordinary Coach.

If you have not heard these ideas before, fear not, there are many other ideas that you have not heard before because as I have said on countless occasions, you don't know what you don't know. I hope that you understand that even as you react to what you are reading, it is your own mind that's doing it to you. What I'm saying is not offensive, what I'm saying is not difficult, what I'm saying is not even true or untrue. What I am saying is something for you to think about.

Remember, if this blog has helped you, or given you any great ideas at all, then please share it with someone you care about, or someone in your family, maybe even your spouse it maybe a revelation to them. Until next time, do me a favor and have a good time.