Just recently, I went to a workshop and part of the workshop was for me and a partner to stand looking at each other, looking into the eyes of one another, and just simply being with the person. As we were standing there looking at one another, the facilitator of the event was saying things like, "This person that you're looking at wants love. This person wants to be needed. This person wants to be cared for."
As he spoke those words or words to those effect, it became clear that the person was just like me and that I was just like they. I believe the same thing is true of you. Being an extraordinary coach obligates you to know this more than the general public. Being an extraordinary coach puts you in a position that you can impact others, but when you impact others, you simply cannot say to them, "I understand that you need love. I understand that you need to be cared for. I understand that you want to look good and be right," because the other thing that's true about human beings is that we don't want to be criticized.
We don't want to be found wrong so that when someone tells us that we're overweight, we're not going to be excited about hearing that. Even though the person that we are speaking to may have the perfect solution for us, we will forego that solution because our feelings are hurt because they said something to us that did not make us feel good.
When you work in an arena of coaching, a similar thing occurs. You can't simply tell people that they need coaching. You can't simply tell people that they need a methodology to run their business. Don't go to someone and say to them, "What is your company culture? Do you have a mission statement, do you have a vision for your business, because all of these things make the people feel less than their best. What exactly do you do?
You have to spend time. You have to sit, think, wonder, get in touch with yourself, ask yourself what you want. Ask yourself what you need before you can then reach out to the people that's going to benefit from your coaching, your extraordinary coaching, I might add.
I have a good friend who works in the financial arena, and he spends lots of time reminding people about the fallacy of the 401(k). I am totally sold on the fact that the 401(k) is the absolutely worst thing that anyone can do with their money. My friend feels the same way. In his marketing efforts, he floods the internet with instances of the 401(k) not working. He floods the internet with reasons why someone should not have a 401(k). If he would stop to think that no one has to be sold on the 401(k), they're just going to work and the boss offers them a 401(k) and they take a 401(k). No one has to convince them of that because they believe that having a 401(k) is the right thing to do.
It takes imagination to figure out what to offer someone before you can get their attention. It takes imagination of what to offer someone when you want to give them a full course meal. Meat and potatoes are the staple of our daily diet, and meat and potatoes are what keep us all going strong. If you offer meat and potatoes, you're not likely to get them at the dinner table but if you offer them some apple pie, if you offer them some peanut butter and chocolate cheese cake, oh yes, they'll be at the table. You offer some Haagen Dazs, they'll be at the table.
In your marketing efforts as an extraordinary coach, I want you to dissuade you from telling people how much they need a coach because nobody wants to be told what they need because if they need something, they're insufficient. I want you to spend your time figuring out the things that you could say to someone that will have them come to the conclusion, "Oh, I need a coach." It may be as simple as exposing yourself or shall we say, releasing lots of videos of yourself in different instances doing different things with someone to get to know you, like you, trust you, and in that case, you need only tell them that you're a coach and they'll hire you.
Being a coach, being a mentor is not something that you can offer to someone. It is someone that chooses to ask you for. Being a coach, as I said in other blogs, and being a mentor, you can't ask them if you can coach them. You can let them know how great a person you are by having instances of you doing different things that will appeal to them.
The focus on this blog today is understand that you are like every other human being in that you need love just like the rest of us. Understand that the things that get your attention and make you feel good are not things that tell you how wrong you are. Practice assessing what comes out of someone's mouth and say things like, "That's a wonderful choice," or something like, "I like that." Make sure that this is heartfelt. Make sure it's authentic. We don't want you going around saying things like this just because it's the right thing to say. You have to use your imagination and sincerely make these comments.
As I like to end all my blogs, I want to ask you to have a good time until the next time, and if this blog has helped you, please share it with your friends, your family, or anyone else you think might be interested.
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