It just occurred to me the truth in the old saying that old habits die hard. I just got into a car, not my usual car, I'm driving a friend’s car and I sat down in the seat before I pulled my legs into the car. That, my friend, is an old habit. Why is it significant that, that old habit is being talked about in this blog? Coaches, like all other human beings also have old habits. Certain habits, you still have them, and you don't need them and they're not serving you. You can make a conscious decision that those habits are not serving you, however, you haven't really told your subconscious mind with enough magnitude that those habits don't serve you. If you had told your subconscious mind, then you wouldn't be doing it anymore.
Just recently, I lost a significant amount of weight, about 70 pounds. Last year this time I weighed over 300 pounds. Weighing that 300 pounds happened to me gradually so I began to incorporate different things into my life so that I could keep living. Weighing 300 pounds, though, you don't want to do it, you simply can't stop living, just because you weigh 300 pounds. You have to do things a little bit differently. When you're on your knees praying, well, you have to grab onto the coffee table to help yourself stand up. When you drop your car keys, you have to actually sit on the floor to pick up your car keys. When you're playing with your children or your grandchildren, if you have any, you can only do it for just a few minutes. All of these things are habits that you develop when you weigh 300 pounds.
Even though I don't weigh 300 pounds anymore, I still deal with some of those habits. Just recently I found myself grabbing on to a table to stand up from a kneeling position. I reminded myself, oh wow, I don't need to do that anymore. I'm driving a friend’s car right now rather than my usual car and so you might think that the new habit that I developed, you might think that I would incorporate them here. Human being are just so habitual, the fact that I'm not driving my car put me in a different place. It was easy for me to forget that I no longer have to sit down on the side and then bring my legs in. I can simply get into a car, just like anyone else. Put my right leg in, swoop myself in without having any hard work, without incurring any difficulties. You had better believe when I was 300 pounds it was difficult to get into a car.
What am I selling all this for, is the question that you might ask. In your business, there are certain things that you did before you became successful and to stop doing those things made you successful and you realized the secret is not doing those things anymore. Like anything else, success eventually finds us complacent. When we get complacent we might not notice things, we may not notice what happens when we get complacent. The responsibility for that lies on the reticular activating system. Our reticular activating system is what helps us ... if we're driving a car and there's noise in the background, our reticular activating system elevates our level of awareness so that, that noise doesn't bother us. If we're driving a car and there's a hum in our car, our reticular activating system elevates our awareness so that doesn't bother us. If you were to hear those sort of noises while you're sitting in a hospital, they would be bothersome. If you would hear those kind of noises while you were at your home, they would be bothersome as well. The reticular activating system, it elevates our awareness.
Similarly when we shed a habit, our reticular activating system takes over then as well. We don't do those things anymore. When there's a change, like when I have a different car, then the reticular activating system might get a little off kilter, might get a little out of sorts, and forget about this thing that we consider to be normal. That's why when I got into my friend's car today, I sat on the seat and pulled my legs in and after I already did it I realized, oh wow, I don't do that anymore.
As a coach you find yourself revisiting those old habits that don't serve you. You might find your clients revisiting things or old habits that don't serve them. As a coach, as an extraordinary coach, it's going to be up to you to bring it to the attention of your client that they are doing something that no longer serves them. You have to remind them that they're doing something that they told you that they wouldn't do and you must make this reminding without fear of reprisals. When someone sheds a habit that's no longer beneficial, they don't want to do that habit anymore. You as a coach might be a little apprehensive about correcting people, but you must shed that. If you want to have extraordinary results with your clients, you must remind your clients when they're doing a habit that no longer serves them.
Your client will love you for it. Your client will be excited about it. Even though they may seem like they didn't want to do it, it may seem like they we're giving you some resistance, your client still will appreciate the benefit of your third party observation. Holding a client accountable to eliminate those habits that they said they do not want to have in their life is your job as a coach. Noticing your habits that will not serve you client, is also your job as a coach.
What I'm suggesting that you do is give your reticular activating system a workout and purposefully remind yourself that no, that's not my habit anymore when you find yourself doing something that no longer serves you. You must be diligent in the monitoring of your reticular activating system because your reticular activating system is there to help you, not harm you. Believe it or not the habits that you develop in your life are also there to help you not harm you. If you will stay present to those habits that are no longer working and eliminate those habits when you find yourself still doing them, you will find yourself getting that much closer to being that extraordinary coach, which I know that you love. Once again if you don't have a coach, get a coach. If your coach is not reminding you of self-destructive habits, get a coach anyway. Until next time, have yourself a good time.
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